There's a 34yo winking at me. Why do i find this weird when my bf is a 38yo married man?
btw, but what hole was i in last night? wanna know if i have to worry
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
This whole living in Ohio thing is getting reaaaaallly old.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
I like you as a friend, but I'm in love with your dick.
be right there i have to get my cape
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I want to strut with the confidence of a pigeon.
Randomize
