Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
On the plus side I got to ride in a fire truck and I didn't have to blow anybody for it
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
end of the world party next friday. virgin sacrifice. tell me you know someone whos still a virgin
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I never realized how you can accidentally go home with someone until tequila got involved.
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
Im so unlucky if I fell in a barrel of dicks, I'd come our sucking my thumb
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