i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
If hangovers were people John Goodman would be living in my skull trying to eat the back of my eyes
I just got a drinking merit badge from a slutty girl scout
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your car is in front of my house. Keys are in the mailbox. There is a fire hydrant in your trunk. Happy Birthday
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
You lit a fire in my vagina no man can extinguish.
I love this text stream: discussing the development of a business model centered around cooking acid to bankroll a yacht trip in Croatia
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
I don't know who he was but he was covered up with a shower curtain and ate a whole bottle of tums
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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