I have been thinking about it and I am really glad we decided to order helmets.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
I've made out with men from every corner of the globe. Sex-wise, I've almost conquered europe. Take that napoleon
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
My cat is staring at me while I drink my wine on the bathroom floor in the morning instead of attending class. Sorry mom and dad. Sorry cat.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
He doesn't like Sabbath and that alone is a GIANT red flag. Learn from my experiences and never, I mean NEVER associate with people that hate Black Sabbath and Motörhead.
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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