She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
If you ever get the opportunity, make fun of how small his dick is for me
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
We need to tone down the drinking before our 7pm class. I don't remember receiving any of these handouts.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My ass is underappreciated
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
You have to get it done early. Like a dick drive by. Hit it and run.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
People probably think I’m a fangirl bc I go to so many shows but it’s really bc I like fucking the tour manager
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