I'll never ask another girl to get on top again, that girl from the bar last night got on top and shit diareah all over my ball sack while she was cumming.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
But how MUCH of an emergency? Like, should I go to the ER now, or can it wait until after the bar crawl?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told you for Halloween we just need to let the loins free! Let the girth come to us in a flock, drenched with passion!
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
Randomize