Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Id settle for living inside the pirates of the carribean ride.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
so sad. i just ate the last good 'n' plenty out of the bottom of my purse.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
That boy needs some memories to take back home with him
What are you doing? Because if it happens to be drinking, or even any activity that rhymes with "drinking", I'll be over in 5.
Don't wake me up to tell me to cook for you because you don't like taco meat.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I was told today that I'm the ugliest bartender in the area, so, I guess I have that going for me.
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
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