I just ate a drumstick out of the garbage. I need a life coach.
she just fell off the couch. onto a bag of pretzels. her face resembled a cat that just swallowed a sock.
i saw a stretcher and literally ran around for 10 minutes telling people it wasnt for me
I must say your penis is just as photogenic as you
apparently my insurance doesn't cover road head. Bummer.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
Is it possible to rally from a drunken seizure?
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Is it immoral to trade sex for the use of his laundry room?
Randomize
