Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
I was so drunk that I passed out before I could do or say anything I'd regret. My low alcohol tolerance is like a guardian angel.
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
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