apparently it's okay for him to stick his dick in my mouth but not to let me have a can of diet pepsi for the road.
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
Dude wtf I'm sitting behind some girl in class who is creeping on my facebook page. I don't even know who she is..
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I just found scrambled eggs in my shower. Thanks for that, asshole.
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
I told her I was dressed as a gag reflex judge.....she won, literally hands down.
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Randomize
