you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Don't pretend like we're functional. We're gonna discuss this drunkenly via text the way serious conversations should take place.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
I climbed out a window to pee last night because i thought i was locked in the room... Then crawled back in and went to bed. The poor neighbors.
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
the raccoons are back...
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