she has no idea who harrison ford is.
see that's why i'd never date someone born in the 90s
He just made his dick say "woof" and howl at me. can you pick me up?
So, I had a dream last night that girls approached guys at the bar and said things like "i would like to pleasure you tonight." No drink buying, no sweet talking or ANYTHING.....it. was. awesome.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'd be lying to you if i said i didn't just bring up microsoft excel to make an alcohol budget
STOP CALLING ME LADY CHLAMYDIA
It's official. I am the girl who threw up in the library. Hangovers and midterms do not mix.
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
I am attempting to break the habit of calling him daddy.
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
He has a syndrome called asshole. And it flares up 24/7.
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
he went down on me WHILE i ate BACON PIZZA! best. boyfriend. ever.
Randomize