I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
Just found out for my occult lit class (history of cults) final project is making a spellbook. Hello last term of college.
i woke up to find out i googled the Twilight Eclipse trailer. so either drunk me doesn't know that i'm straight, or sober me doesn't know that i'm gay
He told everyone he was going inside...an hour later we get a knock on the garage door from some dude telling us a guy is passed out on the lawn and we should get him inside because it's about to rain
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
I wasnt going to have sex with him until i ran into his gf at chipotle. It was like the gods were saying "Go ahead. Shes already had her burrito for the day"
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I just danced on the bar. With a man named Alabama.
Thank you for turning 21. I'm going to love reading your texts.
Nothing worse then being at the gym on the elliptical next to a guy looking at porn on his phone
Then he shook the next streetlight but this one broke and fell over. He told me, "This is the part where we run."
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a taco... I feel like a female Elvis.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize