Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We just reached that moment of the night when you start making cookie quesadillas. Party on Wayne
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Not sure when or why this happened but I just stopped giving a shit about everything
Bitch are you kidding? 2016 is gonna be the year our pussies run for president
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
Woke up on a lawn chair hugging a bottle of vodka. Hows your morning so far?
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
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