I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
Currently doing my walk of shame down a floating dock. No more guys who live on a boat EVER AGAIN
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He puked over my shoulder into the toilet. The guy in the next stall sounded totally appalled.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
Haha we both slept with guys named Brad born on may 1st. This is a proud day for sisters.
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