Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
He goes to Columbia so regardless of how he looks I should fuck him right?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Why is your ex naked in my apartment?
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
I realized just how much my daughter is MINE when I heard her tell someone "Go shit yourself" yesterday.
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
Randomize
