I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
tan lines, throwing up everclear on the beach, doing lifeguards, tequila...summer.
this guy had a colored tattoo of Chucky on his leg, whatever drugs he does, i want them
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
You are the only person I know who got away with wearing a turtleneck while getting laid. ONLY person.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
I'm sorry, you're actually right. Ostrich racing happens, and they're ridden like a horse. Bewildered and distraught.
EXCEPT MY COUSIN SAW MY SEX TAPE!
where are you?
two trains and a bus walk of shame. so not worth it.
Randomize
