So it's 11:24am. I've had sex twice and been laid 3 times. I love holidays!
I understand the whole sex thing but did you really get laid or is that synonymous for more alcohol?????
Honestly.
Don't say a word.
Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
I'm pretty sure there's seven mailboxes in the bathtub...
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
I tell myself every day I shouldn't be friends with you
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
Totally. Bang on. He'll be fine. He might cry into your perfect tits once in a while, but that's the price ya pay.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
And by "sexually intimate," you mean fuck buddies?
Randomize
