I did something stupid with eggs call me when you get up. Cops were also involved.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
: am i supposed to send the mass text 'merry christmas!' to my booty calls too?
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
We're cuddling on the couch that me and his brother had sex on...this feels wrong
just woke up COVERED in glow sticks and glitter. didn't even have to turn the light on to puke.
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Know what's awkward? Having a couple of moving guys watch while you detach the bondage cuffs from your bedframe, that's what.
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
You drank the pool water to get rid of your hiccups
Randomize
