You need to come back and get me. This is not a jersey shore party and he is not dressed as Pauly D and I am about one shot away from hooking up with a real fist pumping Guido.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
he'll always be the guy that i fucked on the bathroom floor
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
God dammit. My lube leaked all over my passport
She picked me up from the bar in her underwear.
My vagina: 1 Male stubborness: 0
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize