it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Is it mean to convince my old booty call she used me for sex so I can bang her again before I leave for Denver?
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
A girl told me I was her "alcohol spirit animal" tonight. Somehow I think my whole life was secretly building up to this moment
Everybody needs breakup sex. You just happened to get yours from a dude who hasn't reached the point of breakup yet. No biggie.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Taking care of drunk people fulfills my need to be a mother
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
