is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Jesus wouldn't steal pop tarts. So why did you?
i wonder if detective benson from law and order takes those handcuffs home. i bet she does.
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
I cannot be with a girl who won't let me come home on my lunch break, eat spicy ranch and watch Breaking Bad without pants on. #lesbianproblems
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
You should come over tomorrow. Wine, pizza and my vagina. Those are all great things.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
Randomize
