porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
New brilliant plan: invite two random okcupid girls to the same bar at the same time, have them compete
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I haven't been motivated enough for a shirt. And only half the day was bra-worthy.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was having relations of the behind variety with my girlfriend. Based on where we were at I could see myself in the bathroom mirror. You know I did the Patrick Bateman point and wink at the mirror and turned on sissudio by Phil Collins.
Does it still count as a valentine if it's drunk phone sex at 3 in the morning
Every time I'm hungover I just want to watch Harry Potter and cry.
Your grandma changed her Netflix password :(
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
We can use the Mac n cheese as the potatoes in our breakfast burritos. Problem solved.
Randomize