i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
So I've only had a mustache for about 5 minutes and I'm already pretty sure it's the best decision I've ever made.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
She got a digital picture frame for her birthday. FINALLY - a place for me to sneak all those penis shots I've taken with my iPhone.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
A milkman. But instead of milk I'm delivering marijuana. And instead of a milk truck it's an armored car.
You're a weed delivery man, in an armored car?
He was lasting forever and I couldn't take it so I faked an asthma attack
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
Why is it that the asexual in our group is the one that gets laid the most often??
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
He stopped mid-fuck to explain his choice in pillows. HE WAS STILL IN ME!
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
I just texted him from the other room to come have sex with me-stress relieved
You are such a millennial
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