Christians are straight up FREAKS
My place. Tomorrow Night. Bring your liver, and something for it to do.
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
I just wish I could congratulate your tits on how much I love seeing them
Oh my god. I'm not ready to be an adult. I'm not ready.
Holy shit there is too much Taco Bell here to talk to you
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
Oh, and one of the worst parts... his name was Mario. I fucked a Nintendo character.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
I just hip-checked Santa and stole his cab.
You ghosted you're own booty call. Wow what a sad sad man.
I am watching the most amazing drunk person ever. Literally such a trooper that you can put anything in front of him he'll drink it. His latest reason for taking another shot was: well whatever. I'm never gonna get married anyway.
Randomize
