careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
I came home with 30lbs of BBQ last night. I can't pick up women in a bar but I sure can pick up leftovers from a corporate party.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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