then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
Ignoring the crisis im in. Sitting in the front yard in a kiddie pool. Wearing arm floaties, fins and a snorkel. Waiting for a hot guy to walk by.
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
Never use fire and ice condoms with a dude who always claims he "didn't know it was the wrong hole"
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Pulling on my sock literally just took me 5 minutes.. The hangover is real
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
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