I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
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If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
It was like I was playing the clarinet on his penis. And I just kept saying I'm sorry.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
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I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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