So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
I need to figure out what I wanna do with my life.
There are margaritas in the freezer still.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
What's it called where you go to the stripclub with two guys that have both gone down on you...
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
I was trying to remember why my knees hurt then I remembered I was twerking on the countertops.
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
Just had sex in the room next to my parents. Heading back to school ASAP.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I kind of really want to call off the engagement but I kind of need his mom's mashed potatoes on thanksgiving so I'm between a rock & a hard place here