Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(704): View more from North Carolina

the the hell do you 'accidentaily" jizz on a shirt thats folded in a drawer?

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(626): View more from California

in mid cry she says "I can be a whore if I want to"

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(610): View more from Pennsylvania

So, i took all the condoms from his nightstand, not in the crazy ex way, but in the I paid for them way.

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(405): View more from Oklahoma

I make your heart skip a beat like that pivotal moment when you open a public toilet lid

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25 People Confess What They’re Shamefully Attracted To
Read it at the TFLN blog
(703): View more from Virginia

Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?

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(623): View more from Arizona

It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster

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(870): View more from Arkansas

I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.

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(716): View more from New York

I'm crying watching Rihanna at the VMAs. Periods are a bitch

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