I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
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I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
The amount of guys who just came into the room to give me a high five after hooking up with him was about 5 too many.
Everyone was passed out so I turned off the lights and locked all the doors. I also took the chicken sandwich in the microwave as payment.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
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We peed on campus in the middle of the tailgate and then hit on a married cop that asked you to stop touching him
I don't think my professor is going to remember the Halloween party... or the fact that he made out with a priest.
I officially have worse injuries from a baby shower than roller derby.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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