i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I walked out of the bathroom and both of you girls were giving the gay guy head. I was like, "laaaterrr."
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I need to move out. I just walk of shamed my way into a family breakfast party. There's no response when grandma says "where you coming from in heels at 9AM?"
Bubblewrap condoms. We can steal Ziplock's new slogan. Protection you can hear.
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
So... Sorry I threw that watermelon at you the other day. I didn't think it would break any bones.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I was all, oh. I've had tattoos and broken a limb. Waxing my lady parts will be a cake walk. I was wrong.
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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