You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
When my options for Friday night are being a 3rd wheel or bringing a gay man as my date i need to focus on other things in life like having a successful career.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
She's currently upstairs fucking her boyfriend while I am downstairs making them a sex playlist watching her boyfriend's Weiner dog and large Boxer try and mount each other. Marvin Gaye is playing. This is the ultimate third wheel fail.
So good news, aparently I blacked out and tried to go in the back of the mcdonalds to thank the people for makin my fries
I threw up in the darkest corner of the bar last night, then watched 2 girls freak out in disgust after walking through it. I then realised I puked on the dancefloor, took a picture and proceeded to send it to my mom.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
Idk I'm drinking Sam Adams and wearing new balances so I'm basically a dad
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
Randomize
