Well douche your snatch and let's go!
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
Well.. considering he unknowingly dated a prostitute, I consider myself the winner in that break up.
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
Okay we're getting vodka and coming
Okay. Joe has my machete attached to his belt
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
