don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
under NO circumstances is it acceptable to fist pump to taylor swift
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I have to sleep with him. We're too much alike. It's like clash of the titans, except instead of clashing, he's putting it in me.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
Watching Colbert Report and porn at the same time.
Randomize
