Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I had to have the lights off to hide my face. I was laughing so hard I almost peed in her mouth
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Are there rules against fucking your ex's dealer?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize
