Guess what I'm doing tomorrow?
Becoming a productive member of society?
Sam. Come on.
I'm fucking him on the second date. I don't give a fuck what Patti Stanger says.
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Oh my god. I just realized something amazing. If I get pregnant with a boy, that technically means I have a penis right??????
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
sex in a hospital.. check
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want to get up and tell you that smells delicious but I'm struggling with the idea of pants
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize