i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
I hit him with a car. Nothing says I hate you more than backing into someone with a fucking car.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Moral of the story - don't craft naked. Your nipples with thank me.
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
