Is it creepy to message a girl and say you had me at stocked liquor cabinet?
He said "I wish they sold 40's in bars".. and a business plan came to mind. Maybe I CAN do something with my degree...
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
I will forever be haunted by the image of you hurrying to finish your Jimmy Johns sandwich in the Taco Bell drive thru so you could proceed to order $17 dollars worth of shitty Mexican food.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
if becoming an adult is chugging a bottle of wine in your bed and crying about your stresses while your dog watches you, sign me up
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I finally got to say all the things I wanted to say. Including telling him he looks like a naked mole rat
All I remember is pissing by the garage and the next thing I know I'm on fire
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
You know. You being in a happy healthy relationship is REALLLYY cutting into our drinking alone together time.
Hangover and judgement, the breakfast of champions.
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
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