My parking ticket this morning was 30bucks. I feel like I'm paying the city to fuck you.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
We're gonna take a moment of silence to pray... that his penis is as pretty and as talented as his brothers.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
the bride at the wedding we just crashed said we can stay only if we strip for her. You need to get down here
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
fond memories of taking my pregnancy test here in this Burger King
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
I JUST REALIZED THAT SINCE LEIA IS TECHNICALLY A PRINCESS AND KYLO REN IS HER SON AND STAR WARS IS OWNED BY DISNEY...KYLO REN IS LITERALLY A DISNEY PRINCE.
Oh my Gods. Why. Why did you have to tell me that. D:
SO YOU CAN SUFFER HAVING THAT KNOWLEDGE TOO.
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
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