I'm going to go hang out on a giant wooden pirate ship for 5 days.
If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I smuggled my gin and tonic out of the bar by shoving the glass in my pocket...mistakes were inevitable.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
I am not saying having unprotected sex in my boss' pool was a good idea, I am just saying it wasn't my worst idea of the summer.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
do nipples grow back?
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Randomize
