Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
you were smoking 3 cigarettes at once saying 'cancer isn't real! Its all in your head!'
He screamed "Oh boy! Oh boy!" during climax.
it only took me 1 hour to write 8 pages. i'm never doing school work without adderall ever again.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
When I am this hungover I become increasingly grateful for having my own private office
On the bright side, only one more day until we aren't sober anymore.
He made me tacos after the sex. Best date ever!
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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