I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Part in the USA is on your top 25 most played on iTunes. you have NO RIGHT to judge me.
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
We just made a drinking game out of our chemistry review. This might explain my chemistry grade.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
my sober ride is dancing w/ a fat girl. i might be awhile
He kept dropping hints about giving me crabs. Like he called my pubes a nest and said he "hoped there weren't any eggs in there."
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I wouldn't even cut tickets or put ppl in jail I'd just hand out punches to the mouth and Liam Neeson throat chops
BTW car sex works all the muscle groups. Just sayin. Legs/butt are sore as are arms, back and core.
Omg no hes gotta go down on me. Then itll be like my vagina has kissed the stanley cup.
Randomize