like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
I was grinding on people that were grinding. Nonconsensual.
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Just had sex to Jesse & the Rippers. Can check that one off the bucket list.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
for some reason leaving your socks onmakes it less meaningful.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
He was so drunk we almost didn't even make it to his place because he didn't know where he lived
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
