people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
the semester isnt officially over until i take the batteries out of my calculator and put them back into my vibrator
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so went to the condom shack today. bought a condom that dresses up your dick in a suit...tomorrow im fucking in style
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
She left a blanket, pillow, a glass of water, and two advils in the bathroom for me. It's like she knew. Best room mate ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
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