Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I'm okay. We got a prayer rug sent to us with the face of jesus on it. From Tulsa Oklahoma. Kinda weird.
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I'm using the Malibu pitcher you stole from the bar to make pancakes this morning. It's actually working really well.
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
Honestly it was like 3 AM and I only agreed to go to the strip club because I wanted chicken tenders
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
I finally selected an outfit that says "I'm not easy" but still shows off the tittays.
Randomize
