absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Used my jumper cables as a bottle opener last night. Really pleased with my problem solving skills.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
WHY DO I KEEP FINDING CHICKEN THROUGHOUT THE HOUSE? GET YOUR ASS HOME NOW!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
I'm driving to work hungover. I feel like I got hit by a train and then drank that train too.
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I just realized u compared me to a coconut
Randomize