Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
I just feel like a girl who's never eaten a pb&j probably doesn't swallow
Well I don't know him that well so I don't think I can give advice. You should make him a cake. Or have sex with him.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
Relationships are fuckin' work. And you can't just up and leave with no questions when you really just need to get home because you're about to shit your pants.
You're so wise.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
I never said it was inaccurate, I said I hate you.
when u match a guy bc he's from Oregon & he's trying to flirt, shut up i just want to talk about trees
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
Randomize
