I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
The trick is to not slur when purchasing the condoms at 3am
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
Yea...coming from the girl who didn't understand why m&ms and tequila wasn't a "suitable diet"
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's holes in the drywall and the beer pong table is a broken door on two barstools. You know they like to party.
Except if I'm having sex. In which case you're in the bed with us or out of the room. No halfsie participation.
We don't watch enough power rangers
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Hes done the math! Hes calculated how much sex it's going to take to fuck 365 miles. Now thats a little brother im proud of. New resolutions are a go!
I got my period on eclipse day. I'm officially in line with the moon.
Randomize