I want to take things slow emotionally, but fast physically
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
Drunk Tina signed up to be part of the crew team and got a text from the captain telling her there's practice tomorrow. Wtf
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
You are so lucky you didn't go back to Tate's house. They decided to figure out who had the biggest balls... I was the judge
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
You said you were going to start drinking less. Drinking 25 small airplane bottle shots do not count.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
I want to respect them as people, but really I just want to have sex with them.
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
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