Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
The lady next to me at the airport just baggage checked a six pack. She is now my hero.
My liver hurts and I just woke up from my first sleep in two days
Sounds like the perfect vacation
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
come home. I need you. I'm too hungover to deal with this hangover alone
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I'm so high that a guy on TV just sneezed and I said "bless you."
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
Randomize