just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
I've officially moved beyond college drinking. I just got business drunk at an internship seminar.
First of all...stop making excuses. Second of all...Fuck the surgeon generals warning
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
I want to be tan and drunk. Is that too much to ask for?
Can you repeat that, but with context?
She puked off the side of the cruise ship onto a newlyweds balcony table and they watched it all happen then they made her clean it up
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
Randomize
