I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
I apparently texted him "since you're taking time out to think about us. You probably need to think about me getting arrested right now."
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I forced myself to puke in my garbage can, and the next day I bought a new one and burnt the old one. You could say it was a rough night
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
I don't remember much from my 21st, but my mom said I insisted on the fat guy taking body shots off me
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
Divorce can be hard, but look on the bright side. Your soon to be ex raved about your dick and I’m great with hard things ;-)
Randomize
